Sunday, January 11, 2004
TeaRs.. i don't know have i been crying this few days... i really don't know.. Luckily my parents went out together and left me alone for somewhat a day..Things are really getting messed up in school.. and.. duuno how.. dunnoe when and dunnoe why.. i've fall for another person.. that's bad.. real bad.. i mean.. urgh! i don't wish to talk about it.. cuz it sucks to the core.. it's just like the chinese saying" wo jiu bu zhi bu jue de ai shang le ta" (sorry malay frens) haix.. it's like.. very very messy.. and talk about school.. i mean.. wah.. for the prefect's thing... really kena liao... i thought although 2003 was a worse year.. but!!! 2004 was even worst.. i have'nt even went through 1mth and stupid stupid stuffs has already popped up... WTF.. stupid la... i really hate this lor.. suddenly like all the people around me changed.. even i changed.. i hate this.. really hate this... Ping YI sux.. some people sux... worst of all.. my life sux!!
Friday, January 02, 2004
No more tears... Not a single drop is left.. i've cried... Because of something sad... nth can cheer me up.. i think i will stop faking.. i wanna be back the old me.. i can't lost her.. But She's no more.. i needa find her.. i know she's somewhere.. but not with me... without her... it's havoc...for me.. i don't know where she went to... but i hope it's somewhere near.. so that i can find her faster.. without the old me... Many things are different.. Way totally different... Not even same in a single way.. cuz.. my old me isn't here.. How can i find her.... HOW.... i cry.. i don't know wad happen to me.. maybe... i dunnoe.. but.. i can't guarentee.. it's because of the person i like.. i love... i've missed... i've cried for.. same here.. he want's back the old lynette.. not the now me... i 've changed drastically.. No more old lynette.. NEW.. different from the past... i used to think that without her.. life's gonna be much more betta.. but it was wrong from the beginning..totally... it's was worst without her... DAMM worst..
i dreamt about him again.. we were holding hands.. talking to each other... it was so sweet.. i can't describe the feeling.. but if u guys have liked somebody b4.. u should know the feeling... it'ss so damm nice.. but when i wake up.. it was just a dream.. an illusion... HALLUCINATION.. too tired.. thinking of him too much.. that's when the brain can't work properly.. and it starts to think of the impossible.. could be possible.. but.. leave it shall be.. don't wanna think about this too much.. I am in 204.. the last express class.. eric might say.. "u gd la.. in Xpress.. i in NA leh.. " but.. the truth is there's no difference.. people in 204 like me.. find it miserable.. they are mixing the good and bad together.. wanting the good to teach the bad.. but.. hahazx.. some how it hink.. the bad will teach the good.. that's the problem with schs.. they think it their way.. never use their brains.. So many brains.. but not is working.. . teachers depises 204.. i can see that.. they think is the last express class.. and.. no hope.. but the truth is that..they never spare a thought for our feelings.. they think we wanna be in this class... i hate this kind of life.. if that's the life i am going to in the future.. i rather.. BE dead thAn alive... i hate it... suckas..
i dreamt about him again.. we were holding hands.. talking to each other... it was so sweet.. i can't describe the feeling.. but if u guys have liked somebody b4.. u should know the feeling... it'ss so damm nice.. but when i wake up.. it was just a dream.. an illusion... HALLUCINATION.. too tired.. thinking of him too much.. that's when the brain can't work properly.. and it starts to think of the impossible.. could be possible.. but.. leave it shall be.. don't wanna think about this too much.. I am in 204.. the last express class.. eric might say.. "u gd la.. in Xpress.. i in NA leh.. " but.. the truth is there's no difference.. people in 204 like me.. find it miserable.. they are mixing the good and bad together.. wanting the good to teach the bad.. but.. hahazx.. some how it hink.. the bad will teach the good.. that's the problem with schs.. they think it their way.. never use their brains.. So many brains.. but not is working.. . teachers depises 204.. i can see that.. they think is the last express class.. and.. no hope.. but the truth is that..they never spare a thought for our feelings.. they think we wanna be in this class... i hate this kind of life.. if that's the life i am going to in the future.. i rather.. BE dead thAn alive... i hate it... suckas..
